When you first enter the liminal space, you’re immediately met with uncertainty; unfortunately, due to programming, we deny it, like a man denying his paternity over a child that looks exactly like him. 

We allow fear to take root within us and for its smoky figure to make a home in every crevice in our body, finally taking control of our brains. Instead of focusing on our dreams of the life we want to create, we now see uncertainty as the enemy, discard our dreams, and scramble for solutions. Still, those solutions bring us back to where we don’t want to be.

We tell ourselves the old brings us guarantees such as money and linear growth that reflects the corporate lifestyle, and yet when we look within, we see our dreams and hopes in a casket while holding the spade and digging the hole to bury the casket in. 

And on the headstone it reads “It just wasn’t meant to be. I’m not lucky like others.”

Ask me how I know! 

I’ve lived this exact scene twice. Both of them were about me doing a 180 to change my life completely. 

In both of these times, I used the vehicle of running a business to do so, but uncertainty came like an unwanted guest, and I mistook it for failure and ran back to the old. 

Now it’s my third time. I quantum jumped. I leaned into the unknown and was led to create businesses, and immediately I’m met with uncertainty. You can read about it here. 

Uncertainty is once again an unwanted guest, but she is familiar. I was hoping she wouldn’t arrive because I had the support of God, my ancestors, spirit guides, and angels. I thought this time my path would be guard-railed like a bowling alley, so the ball had nowhere else to go other than hitting the pins. Still, once again the uncertainty showed up as gutters ready to catch each ball I played into the darkness instead of directing my balls to hit the pins. 

This time round, I didn’t run back. I couldn’t go back! I mean I could. I could have called my old manager up and asked for my job back, but I chose not to. 

This time round, I turned my attention away from my mind and onto my body and listened. My body was calm, my soul was doing a pirouette on points with not a care in the world. She was finally free and excited about what she came here for. So I locked into my inner wisdom and asked the question: 

“Am I on the right path?”

“Yes”

“Things are not moving in the way I want them to.” 

“Things are moving. Things take time.”

“So what do I do?” 

“Keep showing up.”

So that’s what I did. Every day I showed up, and I loved it, but things also got worse, and my income kept decreasing. And I know it had nothing to do with self-worth. I love myself and know I deserve all my blessings. 

My brain wanted to switch off. My energy was waning, and uncertainty had its vines around my throat, pulling tighter with each passing day. 

Like Poirot who cannot stop until the mystery is solved, I continued to show up. 

Then one Wednesday evening, like all my Wednesday evenings, I showed up to my psychic mediumship class. It’s a 2-hour class, and unlike our usual sessions, my mentor talked for 90 minutes on things that I already knew, but the other students were asking questions, and I got annoyed. I’m fidgeting because I cannot sit still for that long. She then talks about soul contracts and pulls an animal card for each of us. 

My mentor tells us to read our own animal card, interpreting the energy we get off the card. This will tell us what our soul contracts are. She pulls the bobcat for me, and at the bottom of the card, it says, “Life is a mystery.” Then she says, “My guides are saying that maybe leopards do change their spots.”

I start laughing because I know that message is for me. I want life to be a mystery because I love surprises, but at the same time I want to find out everything before it happens because I do not get along with uncertainty. And at the moment, my bank account is not getting along with her either. 

So I start interpreting the bobcat. 

I learned that the bobcat is versatile and adaptable. Just like me.

Bobcats raise their kittens alone. Just like me

Bobcats are solitary creatures. Just like me. 

Bobcats are adaptable and versatile because they’re forever facing uncertainty due to prey, seasons, and cycles always changing. Because of this, they can prey on almost any size animal and rarely have any predators. 

Immediately, a shift occurs within me. I knew I had just experienced a breakthrough, and I knew what my soul’s contract was; I’m to master uncertainty. Uncertainty is my path, which is also why I’ve been guided to teach women how to navigate the liminal space. Everything about the liminal space is about uncertainty. 

It’s why I’ve been guided to build 3 businesses to adapt to the cycles and seasons I’ll be experiencing.

Then the interpretation came for the message my mentor gave: “Maybe a leopard can change its spots.” I saw that bobcats are born with their spots, and I realised that my spots represent my material needs. Instead of trying to bypass it in uncertainty and force myself to be content with just my basic needs being met, I’m to set up guardrails so I still have access to resources to meet my material needs while I build my businesses. 

The next morning, I applied for three part-time jobs—all similar work. The conditions were that they had to be part-time and so easy that they wouldn’t take from me the energy needed (creatively, emotionally, and mentally) to show up for my businesses the way I want to. 

That same morning, one of the positions I applied for contacted me. We had a meeting; I told them my terms, they accepted and hired me on the spot. 

My epiphany is that uncertainty does not mean failure. It doesn’t mean that whatever you’re doing is not working. All it means is it’s new. It takes time for acorns to turn into oak trees, and in the process it needs nurturing and a whole lot of belief that it’s going to grow.

I’m under no illusion that my work with mastering uncertainty is done yet, but while the next layer is revealing itself, I’ll be celebrating my small victory.